Friendship is a strange and bewildering thing. When I was younger, I used to hate large gatherings. They made me uncomfortable because I was so shy and introverted. As I grew older, I didn’t mind hanging out with larger crowds, provided I was with a close friend as a support system. This isn’t my issue per se, just a little looking into my background. What I want to say is that it’s not in my nature to have many superficial friends. I prefer a close-knit, hand full of people who I can trust, rely on, lean against, shout at or near without being judged or hated (basically people I can get sloppy drunk and wild with minus the next day awkwardness).
Back in middle school, I managed to start a fruitful relationship with a person I would eventually call a friend. That one turned to the magical handful that remained till high school. Mind you, we did everything together – hung out at school, got together after school, joined sports teams together, traveled, slept over, took turns dating each others girlfriends. The list goes on. So many other things that I imagine would be hard to share here (maybe in future posts).
Now despite the years of cultivating such close bonds, when high school came to an end , things just fell apart somehow. We all went in our own ways, eager to move on and live the college life abroad. What’s surprising is that we never actually put our heads together to allow the friendship to naturally take us to the next level. We were all in middle and high school together, what’s the harm in all going to college or university together too? even if one of us didn’t make it academically, we could have at least fought to be as close as possible. You would think this be the logical thing to do. You’re wrong, we couldn’t have been further apart – and for no apparent reason except our stupidity and lack of future hindsight. The good thing is we all left under good terms, no animosity or ill feelings. There was the occasional phone call (this was before the social media craze) and coincidental bump ins when we were visiting home.
Let’s take this a little further. College time passed and the majority of us came back home to Kuwait and entered the work force. You’d think we’d round each other up and pick up where we left off right? In the short period after returning home, we did but then marriage was around the corner and one by one we were walking down the plank. Each carrying a load heavier than the other…dragging him deeper and deeper into light deprived waters.
I still bump into some old friends once in a while, but why has it become this way? Do they no longer want to be friends? Have I done something wrong? I don’t think our interests have changed enough to revert to acquaintances, I spent more time with some of the guys than with my own brothers! We all have smartphones now, over connected in every way by social and un-social (whatever that means) media. So why are we not friends like before? If anything, we should be urging to hangout – seeing as how addicted to hanging out together we were in the past. Some of the guys to get together sometimes, which I’m also not a part of.
I find this very strange and hard to wrap my head around. I’ve tried on several occasions to make contact with a few guys and I managed to hangout a bit, but never on a scheduled basis like you’d expect. I can only deduce that there’s something wrong with me or I’m so gullible that i’ve run myself into a friendship void.